Ridhi was sitting at the office canteen with some of her colleagues and talking to them over some hot coffee. She noticed a man sitting on the next table stealing her glance and smiling under his lips. She looked at him and when their eye met, he blushed. ‘Stupid!’ said Ridhi under her breath.
In the evening after her office got over she came out on the road waiting for the bus arrive. Right then she saw that man came and stood beside her. The smile was still on his face, as if he knew her since so long. He came closer and said, ‘Are you still angry with me?’
‘I’ve never seen a stupid like you.’ it was a serene reply of angry Ridhi. ‘Why are you following me like that Ishan? It’s my office and I feel awkward when you look at me like that before everyone. Just stop it, for god’s sake.’ Her anger seemed not to be melt spontaneously. But he knew how to handle it.
‘Do you know something? I may be so bad but I can’t live without you.’ Ishan said and bending his knees before her on the road he hold a rose before her and added, ‘If you don’t smile now, I’ll cry loudly and make people gather here. Do you want to see that? Here it is.’ He said and screamed in a hilarious tone to pretend crying. A corner of her lips glittered.
‘Stop!’ she squalled. ‘Stop this nonsense or I’ll kill you.’ she said and smiled smugly and he hugged her right there on the road. Ishan knew that smile well. To him, it was the most precious smile in the world because it has both love and forgiveness.
Ridhi was the only daughter of their parents. They were rich. Her father does a foreign service in Norway and visit home after every six months and spending a whole month with the family he returns again. Now her father was not home. Her mother can’t sleep alone so that every night she sleeps with her daughter.
At night lying beside her mother Ridhi was waiting for her mother to get asleep and then she could talk to her Ishan over phone. She had a process to check if her mother fallen asleep. Lying beside her mother she would often ask her something after every five minutes and when her mother gives no reply that means she was asleep. Today same thing happened. Seeing her mother asleep she was talking to Ishan in whispering tone. Her whispering was so delicate that even her mother couldn’t hear if she was awake. God knows how Ishan could hear.
After an hour when she hung up the call, she felt her mother placed her hand over her. Oh my god! She was not sleeping today and that means she heard her conversation over phone. Ridhi fell into a great embarrassment right then.
‘With whom were you talking so long Ridhi?’ still closed her eyes her mother asked with a groggy tone. She was caught today by her mother and now she was feeling the great uneasy. She tried to escape so she answered, ‘No one Mom, it was a friend of mine.’
‘But as far I know, you don’t have a friend name Ishan.’ Oh god! How did she know his name? She asked her mother who told her about him and her mother replied, ‘I saw his name on your phone when I use it to call your papa.’
‘Gosh! Why she had to use my phone to call her husband? And how stupid I am, I should have deleted his number from the call list.’ She thought that in her mind. She knew what will happen now. Her mother will make her crazy asking thousands of questions about him that she would not like to hear. And that started.
‘Why are you hiding it from us? We always want you to choose your life partner in your own. You are getting older and I started worrying about you every day. Listen Ridhi, you don’t need to hide it. Just bring him home and I’ll talk.’ Ridhi said noting to reply. She just closed her eyes tying to grab the sleep.
Next day she came to the office. Today there was a birthday celebration of her boss and her boss wanted everyone to be present at the event. They had some plans. At first they will cut the cake in the office and later they will go to a restaurant together to have great lunch.
Today Ridhi wore a yellow Shari. Yellow was the favorite color of her Ishan. Ridhi had another plan in her mind. She decided that she won’t attend the birthday celebration. Instead, she will spend the entire day with her Ishan sitting on their favorite restaurant. Today she will tell him how she was caught last night and the most important thing her mother wanted him visit their house.
When she went to the office, her boss came to her desk and like everybody she too wished him ‘Happy Birthday’. He thanked her and told to get ready for the celebration. Ridhi hung her face down and said slowly, ‘I’m sorry sir. I can’t attend to the celebration. Actually I’ve some important things to do so I’ve to leave the office soon.’ Boss made his face dark and said all of her colleagues were going and she too should join. It’ll have so much fun. Again he asked if he could manage but again she said sorry and gave an excuse. ‘Actually I have to visit to the hospital. A relative is dying there and wants to see me.’
Coming out from her office she went to her favorite restaurant. So many times she came here before with her Ishan and spent hours talking to him over the coffee. The restaurant was beautiful. Ridhi had an opinion that the restaurant has everything perfect, except the waiters. They are very strange. She doesn’t know why all of them just stare at her in a strange way. She feels so awkward.
Ishan was laughing hearing how she was caught last night. ‘You are so foolish Ridhi.’ He braked his laughter and said this. ‘Who told you to talk to me lying beside your mother? You could do that going to the next room or sitting another place.’ Ridhi became furious. Sitting on her chair she bends over him and grabbing his collar she said, ‘check your phone, I’m the one who always call you, not you. In this last five years I’ve never seen you calling me for once. And today you are teaching me how to talk? I’m not a fool. You are the fool who doesn’t stop coming of my dreams every day.’ She said it like a dormant volcano irrupted suddenly but in a sweet way.
Again she noticed all the waiters were looking at her strangely and this time also rest of the people sitting around. She doesn’t know what problem they had with her and decided next time they will never come to this restaurant anymore. As she was going to say this to Ishan, she saw her boss and her colleagues entered into this restaurant. Oh god! Didn’t they find any other restaurant in the city? She whispered Ishan to leave the restaurant immediately and she tried to hide her face but it was late. Her boss already saw her and now he was coming toward her.
‘Ridhi! You are here? You were supposed to visit to the hospital right?’ the boss asked her and her face became red with embarrassment. His boss asked again, ‘You didn’t to go to hospital but tell me one thing, what are you doing here sitting alone?’
‘I’m Alone?’ Ridhi uttered and looked around. Ishan was not there. He had never been. Right in front of all she started weeping and then busted into tears. It’s been five years her Ishan died. She could remember, yes she could.
Five years before she was studying in her collage. She had always been a little bit shy and did not talk to the boys so much. Her friends tried to push her into relationships many times but they did not make it succeed. Many boys fell for her but she never bothered to give them a single glance. She liked to sing, she liked to listen the music and she liked to dance behind the locked door. But the thing she never liked was reading books. If she ever went to the bookstore with her friends, she kept herself restrain from going inside. Instead, she would have had the ice cream standing in front of the bookstore. If she ever sat to read any story book or novel, she would fall asleep within a moment. Books seemed ghost to her.
One day when she went to the collage, she saw a writer came to promote his book. She saw her friends were gathered around him with so much excitement to have a sign in their respective copies. Seeing her standing away, a friend of her came and said, ‘Ridhi, what are you doing here? See who has come to our college. It’s Ishan Mukherjee, the famous author in our country. Come quickly, have a copy and sign it from him. You’ll never get this chance again.’ ‘What the hell! Why should I go to him? I don’t ever hear his name before.’ She was going to say that but could not. As she looked ahead, her eyes met with that person. He seemed not to be an author. To her, an author means too old a person whose hairs turned while and who had experience almost everything in his life. This young man had nothing among those but he had something else and it was in his eyes. Those eyes were so serene and illusive. After looking into them she couldn’t resist herself from going to him. She handed a copy to him and he asked her name. It was the beginning of a new novel in his life.
After returning home she kept the book into the piles of her class books and forgot about the meeting. Perhaps she would totally forget about it if an incident did not happen. One day on the way back home from her collage, she had been waiting for a bus arrives. She was alone there. Suddenly a black car halted before her and the person, who got down from the car was no one but that young author. She could not remember his name only she could remember his Bengali surname. ‘Hey Ridhi! Are you waiting for a bus?’ she was stunned. How did he remember her name? ‘Come inside, I’ll drop you.’ opening the door he said her almost pleading. There was no certainty of when the bus will arrive yet she did not want to go with him. But those eyes, so serene and illusive and she could not deny. She board on his car and sat beside him. She did not know how to make a conversation with an author so she stayed quiet and waited for him to begin. ‘Have you read my book?’ it was the first thing he asked but she couldn’t understand what to say. Watching her feeling uneasy by her look, he smiled and said, ‘It’s okay. I understand you’ve not. I’m not that big author to be read by everyone.’
After this meeting she did not know how a great respect had been built in her heart for him. Returning home she picked the book and started reading. Strange! For the first time in her life she was enjoying reading a book. The more she was reading, the more compassion she was feeling for the author. Now she wished she could meet him again. Going to the bookshop she bought all his books and finished reading. The author became so special to her. Without her conscious she started dreaming about him day and night.
One day she went to his house to give him surprise but she became surprised when she came to know that he already knew she would come. Meanwhile she also came to know that he had arranged so many information about her that made her totally stunt. He told her she was very special to him and gave a piece of paper in her hand and said, ‘Open it at night before you go to sleep.’
Returning at home she had been waiting for the night befell when she would be able to read the paper. When finally the moment came, she opened the paper and there it was..
The first moment of sun coming up and
Consumed all the darkness,
is the moment I stop dreaming you.
Then all through the day I keep praying to have you.
Every moment your thoughts fall over me like the winter dew
and makes me shiver when I think of you.
As she read this, her heart became fulfilled with happiness. She knew what it was. It was an indirect proposal and that means he loves her. Finally her dream has become true. That night she could not sleep at all. Whenever she closed her eyes she saw Ishan was lying beside her hugging her tightly.
Their love was increasing day by day. Ishan told her that he can die but their love will never die. He will always be with her because she loved an author.
One day they were sitting by the lake. His head was resting on her lap and she was flicking her fingers gently through his hair. Right that moment a poem came out through his mouth.
When you look at me it seems
A glory comes to me from your eyes and makes my heart warm,
With its heat, soon it will melt all the chains and I’ll be free.
Praying for you is my battle and
your smile is my freedom.
It was beautiful. Ridhi asked him when he would marry her and replied, ‘Anytime, whenever you would ask.’ Hearing his answer she kissed on his forehead.
Ridhi said, ‘Once I become your wife, every night you’ll have to hear me a poem before I go to sleep.’ Ishan said nothing but smiled.
‘You love me so much nah?’ asked Ridhi mixing with so much cuteness.
‘Why? Any doubt?’ retorted Ishan.
‘No, but you are mature. You are a wirter and you know how to love someone and I know you’ll never hurt me, but sometimes..’ She interrupted all of a sudden.
‘Sometimes… what?’
‘Sometimes I wish you could make some insanity for me. I mean every girl wants her lover does something crazy to make her happy so that she could smile or laugh whenever she remember that. I think everything shouldn’t be so perfect, you know.’ Ridhi said while running her fingers through his hair. Ishan got up and making his eyes wide, he said, ‘You mean you want me to do some crazy for you, right? But tell me what you actually want me to do?’ he said with a little bit agitation.
‘Hmm.. like you jump into the lake and getting up hug me being wet.’ She said and laugh. It was just a joke but as soon as she told, he got up and jumped into the water. The lake had the water up to the brim and he did not know how to swim. He thought she would also jump to save him and together being wet they would hug each other that she wanted. But he didn’t know that she also can’t swim.
First time when she saw he was not coming up she lost her mind. She started calling him by his name and then screamed. Hearing her screaming people around stared at her. For a moment she forgot she also can’t swim. Without thinking twice she jumped into the lake, to save him or to die with him. People came rushing. Ridhi was found alive but he was not. Police discovered his body after five hours.
For a couple of days she had been admitted to the hospital. She heard he was dead but she did not cry because she could see he was there. He was sitting right in front of her not being a ghost. He was still alive in her delusion.